Cool Mommy

Last night I had 5 (at first) and then 4 (one got sad) girls spend the night. I didn't have sleepovers when I was younger because there was no money, plus mom was always at work to support us. I mean, I usually spent the night at my best friend's house, but there were no big ones until we moved to MD. I knew when I was younger that I wanted to be a "Cool Mommy". Which, at the time, meant letting MY kids do whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted. I was usually mad at mom at the time! Now, of course I know that being a young parent means a finer line I have to walk...be a parent first, then a "cool" parent. However, I love to give Samantha experiences that I didn't have, and that includes sleepovers. I kept my friend's three last night, plus another one from another friend, and I am so blessed that my best and dearest friends have kids about the same age and that our kids are friends. It was crazy and loud, but we had tacos, banana splits, and dancing! I love that I am not always popular, but most of the time my kid thinks I am pretty cool. If I were always the cool mom, then I would not be doing the job I was hired to do...and that is raising my kid to be smart, honest and well-behaved. Sometimes, though, it's fun to be cool.

Just dropping by...

Guilty. I have not written in days. It seems like there are never enough hours in my day, much less 24 of them. If I didn't have to do that whole sleeping thing then I would use those hours too.

To sum it up~ recent events have left me trading my husband for a puppy....yes, we have separated and that is a whole 'notha story...we are now the proud mama and sisters of a Pug named Salem. What joy dogs bring to our lives. I am only sorry we waited so long. We are busy as ever with school and work..in addition to Child Watch I am now working in After School Care and that is nice....to be with older kids that use full sentences and don't cry as much!! One of these days will bring a longer post...a joy to the 3 readers I have! A bit of advice to you that I am slowly learning...we are so much to everyone...spouse, parent, lover, employee, friend, child...remember we are only as good to everyone else as we are to ourselves. Cherish yourself first.

I stole this from Jessi!

YOU CAN ONLY ANSWER EACH QUESTION WITH ONE WORD. GOOD LUCK!
1. Where is your cell phone? charging
2. Your significant other? separated
3. Your hair? messy
4. Your mother? asleep
5. Your father? asshole
6. Your favorite thing? daughters
7. Your dream last night? terror
8. Your favorite drink? Dew
9. Your dream/goal? stability
10. The room you're in? living
11. Your fear? death
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? debtless
13. Where were you last night? work
14. What you're not? content
15. Muffins? blueberry
16. One of your wish list items? money
17. Where you grew up? maryland
18. The last thing you did? "surfed"
19. What are you wearing? shirt
20. Your favorite TV show? lots
21. Your pet? non-existant
23. Your life? jumbled
24. Your mood? contemplative
25. Missing someone? always
26. Your car/truck? comfortable
27. Something you're not wearing? bra
28. Favorite Store? target
29. Your summer? beach
30. Your favorite color? purple
31. When is the last time you laughed? today
32. Last time you cried? today
THREE PLACES I GO OVER AND OVER: Wanda's, work, target
THREE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS: mac~n~cheese, chocolate, pasta
PLACE I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW: anywhere

Happy Birthday!

I have been following this blog...Confessions of a CF Husband, for quite a while. Every morning I eagerly check to see if Nate (the husband) has written anything new. Today, it is the miracle baby Gwyneth Rose's FIRST birthday. I know that their family does not know me, nor do I really know them...but thanks to their blog I get to read about a family who brings me hope and joy every day. Have a beautiful birthday Gwyneth, and to Nate and Tricia, enjoy your daughter today. And Nate, I'm sure I don't have to remind you, but you are a lucky man!

ABC..all about me!

A is for age: 30. I don't want to talk about it. Nope. Just don't.

B is for burger of choice: bacon, cheese, mayo and ketchup

C is for the car I drive: Honda Odydessy (sp?) Minivan

D is for your dog's name: I don't have one. I have two kids.

E is for essential item you use every day: My laptop. Can't...live...without...

F is for favorite TV show at the moment: still Law and Order:SVU

G is for favorite game: Text Twist on the computer and Quizzy's Word Challenge on Webkinz

H is for home state: the great state of North Carolina!!

I is for instruments you play: had piano lessons once upon a time

J is for favorite juice: Apple

K is for whose bum you'd like to kick: mine....I threw away my the box for my new cell phone and now cannot send away for the rebate!!

L is for last restaurant at which you ate: McDonald's (if that counts as a restaurant) if not...the WeatherVane, a fantastic restaurant in Chapel Hill

M is for your favorite muppet: Kermit

N is for number of piercings: one in each ear..not brave enough for anything else

O is for overnight hospital stays: 3...I think

P is for people you were with today: Mom, Wanda and the whole crew, and my beautiful girls

Q is for what you do with your quiet time: read, the computer

R is for biggest regret: I try not to have those..they suck.

S is for status: well...separated at the moment...not sure what's gonna happen there

T is for time you woke up today: not sure...the baby played for a while in her crib so I dozed

U is for what you consider unique about yourself: I can tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue

V is for vegetable you love: green beans

W is for worst habit: criticizing...trying to work on that

X is for x-rays you've had: I honestly don't have a clue

Y is for yummy food you ate today: Macadamia nuts dipped in chocolate

Z is for zodiac: Aries....and I can be a stubborn Ram, lemme tell ya!!

2008

Farewell 2008. I am not going to be nostalgic, because, frankly, 2008 needs to go. I sit here writing this 25 mins before the year turns, and I can honestly say, Hello 2009! There have been good and bad, but a new year always brings new chances to do it differently. May this new year bring chances to do it differently, but to do it (whatever it is) wisely and beautifully. Happy New Year everyone!

Cycles

I am a terrible blogger. Terrible. I post sporadically, don't I? I will try to do better, especially since I realized that some people are actually really reading this. The title of this one? Refers to Life. I am so pleased for my friend N. She just had her fourth angel and lemme tell ya, he is one CUTE kid. On the other end, a blog that I follow...this mom just lost her baby at almost 12 weeks pregnant. Joy and sadness at the same time. How is it that some experience so much joy while others only misery? I have a very dear friend who is suffering through grief as we speak. She just lost another baby...the second one in just a few months. There is no explaining things sometimes, ya know? I realize that birth and death are the cycles of life...just seems like too trite of words to fit it all in. Another cycle would be that I have connected, due to the miracle of MySpace, with my half-bro who is turning 16 in 2 days. I have not seen nor spoken to him since he was 8. Much to my surprise, shock, disbelief....he embraced me (cyber-embraced) with open arms. He could have said Go to Hell for not being there all these years. Why the estrangement you ask? Simply put...I found out that my father was not the man I thought, and I was tired of trying to maintain a relationship. My step-mother and brother were casualties of this, unfortunately. I have never forgotten about E, (my bro) and I am beyond thrilled to get a second chance. However, my father (or sperm donor, as the case may be) does not want E speaking to me. Angry? Why, yes, I will take a spoonful of that. Bitter...how about a cupful? Both of these emotions that help no one, least of all me, and that, with a tumultous relationship with the ex, I have tried to banish from my life. Whew. That was a mouthful. Negative energy begets negativity. I don't want to be bitter or angry. I am trying to reconcile my feelings about my father. So far, no dice. But, I will take full advantage of this next cycle in my life and explore this wonderfully new-found opportunity with E, permission or no permission. N, I am so happy for you. Enjoy this new life, and give thanks. You can bring him in to get kisses anytime now, ok?!

Fire and Ice

Some say the world will end in fire, Some say in ice. From what I've tasted of desire I hold with those who favor fire. But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate To say that for destruction ice Is also great And would suffice. ~Robert Frost

One of my favorite poems. Search it and find your own meaning as to the cycles of life.